When something means alot to you, it means nothing to them but when something means everything to them they expect you to understand and feel the same way about it aswell.
Well im sick of it.
You never get anything i say and when it comes to comfort you are the worst friend i could ever imagine to be there for me.
You suck!!!!!!
This one thing means so much to me and i would really enjoy and be comforted by your support for me. But no as i have always said everthing comes infront of amy she is the last priority and she always will be. And you know maybe its just time to finish your stupid game and get it over and done with.
GAME OVER
This is the biggest thing i have ever wanted and ever asked of you, everything else i have put aside for you and you still cant respect my decisions and what i want in life.
I never thought i would say this but im actually starting to hate you and that is something i never wanted.
(not based on lauren)
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Not So Perfect
In my beginning everything was black a big dark empty hole with nothing to fill it.
I had a loving family and everything i thought my world could be, but as a child everything is what you want it to be, you never understand the real meaning of things and why they are happening.
You think and see everything as a world, your world and there is nothing that can break it.
But then as you get older you see things in a different light, everything becomes clearer and your understanding of the world becomes sometimes just a little more than you can handle. You learn to take everything as it comes.
And when is just too overwhelming you beleive that the ones who around you the adults, mums and dads, granparents and family can protect you from the big bad wolf that is just creeping around the corner and waiting to introduce you to the world of imperfection that awaits.
One thing i had to learn early was there is so much bad in this world and as a child you think you are immune to it, but we arnt we are only very blind as to what is really happening.The adults and ones we look up to literally, are keeping our eyes nice and closed as to what is really happening on the outside.
And as you grow up and understand more and more your world comes crashing down bit by bit.
To be continued.................
I had a loving family and everything i thought my world could be, but as a child everything is what you want it to be, you never understand the real meaning of things and why they are happening.
You think and see everything as a world, your world and there is nothing that can break it.
But then as you get older you see things in a different light, everything becomes clearer and your understanding of the world becomes sometimes just a little more than you can handle. You learn to take everything as it comes.
And when is just too overwhelming you beleive that the ones who around you the adults, mums and dads, granparents and family can protect you from the big bad wolf that is just creeping around the corner and waiting to introduce you to the world of imperfection that awaits.
One thing i had to learn early was there is so much bad in this world and as a child you think you are immune to it, but we arnt we are only very blind as to what is really happening.The adults and ones we look up to literally, are keeping our eyes nice and closed as to what is really happening on the outside.
And as you grow up and understand more and more your world comes crashing down bit by bit.
To be continued.................
SORRY
SO this is my first blog in a long time. Havnt had really anything that stood out but now that i think about it more i seriuosly think i have so much to tell i really dont know where to start!!!
Someone once told me that saying sorry meant you will never do it again, and that is what i havnt taken it to mean and everytime i say it i really wont do it again, that saying stuck with me and everytime someone said SORRY to me i would tell them what it meant and if they ever did the same thing again that was it, NO more.
But you know some people find it as a way out of things, an excuse, a meaning less word that gets them out of trouble.
And i could say that probably 80% of the time the person saying it doesnt mean it.
Which is really disapointing, especially when it comes from someone you really want to except it from and think they will never do those things again. But you know what when someone does something wrong unless they get punishment for the crime they have committed against you they will do it again.
When you get hurt once, they are the fool, get hurt twice just hope and pray to god they wont do it again, but when its the third time and nothing is going to change your the idiot who is sucked in to the web of a great liar and suck ass.
Sometimes no matter how much you love someone or how much you need them you just have to let them go. No matter how many times they say sorry or beg for your forgiveness a person has one chance to change and if they dont they never will.
So many of us get caught in a trap, you love someone so much all you want to believ is that they will change, but when the evidence says otherwise there is just a time you let go and forget them.
So what does sorry mean to you???
Im sick and tired of hearing that word. It used to mean moral and value to me and now it means nothing. You hear a word over and over again and it just starts to become a habit.
When it comes to using the brain and the heart together, do not always trust your heart your brain is what will keep you safe!!!
Someone once told me that saying sorry meant you will never do it again, and that is what i havnt taken it to mean and everytime i say it i really wont do it again, that saying stuck with me and everytime someone said SORRY to me i would tell them what it meant and if they ever did the same thing again that was it, NO more.
But you know some people find it as a way out of things, an excuse, a meaning less word that gets them out of trouble.
And i could say that probably 80% of the time the person saying it doesnt mean it.
Which is really disapointing, especially when it comes from someone you really want to except it from and think they will never do those things again. But you know what when someone does something wrong unless they get punishment for the crime they have committed against you they will do it again.
When you get hurt once, they are the fool, get hurt twice just hope and pray to god they wont do it again, but when its the third time and nothing is going to change your the idiot who is sucked in to the web of a great liar and suck ass.
Sometimes no matter how much you love someone or how much you need them you just have to let them go. No matter how many times they say sorry or beg for your forgiveness a person has one chance to change and if they dont they never will.
So many of us get caught in a trap, you love someone so much all you want to believ is that they will change, but when the evidence says otherwise there is just a time you let go and forget them.
So what does sorry mean to you???
Im sick and tired of hearing that word. It used to mean moral and value to me and now it means nothing. You hear a word over and over again and it just starts to become a habit.
When it comes to using the brain and the heart together, do not always trust your heart your brain is what will keep you safe!!!
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